Late post on nov 13 , not raining , but the skies look cloudy . Maybe this few days the sky calmed down alot , so do i , had been thinking alot lately ..... Every thing is getting weird every single day , everybody is starting a cold shoulder on me zzzZZZzz....... am i really rotting away , not fresh anymore? Sometimes just feel like jumping off building , 15 floor may just die XD....... maybe because never felt so lonely before .... No one message me anymore , im just like a dead petal of rose ......rotting away in the surrounding? Ask you , tell you , never reply , everytime i blink my eye i hope a u had replied , a comment is just so heavily important to me now.... Without it , i felt so pissed off , is like a man talking to a scarecrow?? Maybe could just go back to my cool ways and stop caring about things happening around me ....then im no better than a dead man......Every one wanted to pursue the attention of their love ones and may sometimes failed to do so , at least better than me ... now then i know , how well my family members cherish me and understand me and how well friends and peers treat me as....No longer felt cared , felt like a piece of junk! Maybe i am a dead man in your mind or i am just a friend that you chuck aside ? Well then i just wanted just friends that would be at my side .thats all , a simple request made by pancake.....i tot that this holiday would be a memorable one , well maybe not ...with all the ignorance by my friends just makes me sad and pissed off.

When will it stop?? i dont know!